Touch-A-Touch-A-Touch-A-Touch Me

I have been singing with the wonderful trio of ladies called the “Glowettes” for many years. They are such supportive, kind, loving, steadfast friends and I feel very blessed to know them and to have been able to perform with them over the years.

We have had countless opportunities to sing for different occasions like military reunions, private parties, retirement facilities, churches, commercials, radio shows, and for about six years, toured with a roadshow. Sometimes we turned down a gig if we felt it wasn't right for us but we never wanted to miss an opportunity to sing in church whether it was our own church or another.

We have a vast number of stories to tell about the adventures of “us” to the point that we have even talked about writing a book. We just need to sit down and do it. As I sit here thinking about all of our escapades, one particular story pops into my head.

The “Glows” have always performed many genres of music - from country to big band, gospel, sacred, 40’s, and more - so it was not unusual for a church to invite us to do a secular concert. The church we had been invited to was a well-attended church. And, being the crazy girls that we are, we decided to change things up a bit to bring more laughter and audience participation in our concert. We had always thrown out glitter, candy, a little dance or whatever seemed to fit that performance.

We use our relationships with friends to make a connection to the audience but sometimes that connection is a little uncomfortable...

This particular concert we decided that we would invite men out of the audience to “sway” and sing a song with us that everyone knew. When this audience participation song came up, we left the stage, picked a partner, and headed back up to our places.

We took the time to instruct the guys on what they would be doing.

“So,” I said, “put your arms around our waist and when we sway to the right you sway to the right. Let's rehearse it, okay?”

That was the hardest thing to accomplish. I swayed to the right, he swayed to the left.

“Okay,” I said, “Let's try again.”

These guys couldn't grasp it so we decided to start the music and just go with it. Each guy got into the position and we were ready to perform.

The music started.

If you think it was easy trying to get guys to sway in the same direction while having their arms around your waist... then think again. It was like having ice skates on for the first time, trying to push off and getting nowhere cause the 200-pound dude ain't movin’!!!

By this time, I was laughing so hard tears were streaming down my face. If that wasn't bad enough, I stuck my mic up to my guy’s mouth so he could be heard singing instead of me. If you thought I was laughing, then you should have experienced what I heard coming out of his mouth. This guy - bless his heart - sounded like a wolf howling at the moon. He wasn't singing; he was bellowing.

I had lost all ability to sing.

As I glanced to my left, I realized my situation was minor compared to what my “Glow sisters” were experiencing.

One of the “Glows” was a little on the short side. When our audience participants were chosen, we had no idea how tall each one was. Unfortunately, the shortest “Glow” had chosen the tallest partner. As we sang and swayed, this gentleman's arms and hands were getting higher and higher till they were right under her arms and almost across her chest. She was trying to rectify the situation... but, one of her hands was holding the mic, one hand was trying to manipulate his arms back down from her yaboos to her waist while trying to get him to sing and at the same time sway in the right direction.

You can imagine how it looked to the audience because this gentleman had no clue what was happening. Let's face it... when his arm started sliding up... there was no stopping them! She must have felt like she was at the drive-in movie on a first date.

By this time, her chin rested on her bosom because of the tight grip he had on her. We were quite relieved when this number was over. The audience got a real chuckle out of all of it, especially the wives who allowed us to “borrow” their husbands.

Now we don't have to draw men from the audience as we have two of our very own who have joined the “Glows” permanently.

Some people say that church is boring, but it wasn’t that night! So, please remember, the next time that you go to a concert and the music touches you, that doesn’t give you permission to touch back...

As for now, we’ll keep singing... “Shine little glow worm - glimmer, glimmer.”